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Live A Healthy Life

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洪生 发表于 2024-10-25 12:29 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
    Rcently,more and more people are talking about live a healthy life.Form my perspective,it is totally undoubted that healthy life means a balanced diet and exercise.The reasons why i believe so are listed as below.
    The first point that i want to mention is that we should eat healthy food and that is because balanced diet can make us strong.What is more,it's easir for us to understand that we should doing exercise,which is because exercise can help us relax.
    Form what i mention above,we can easily come to the conclusion that live a healthy life.After all balanced and exercise.
陶果果 发表于 2024-10-25 12:29 | 显示全部楼层
评分档次:第四档 (7-12分)

评语:
这篇作文完成了一部分试题规定的任务,但未能清楚地表达所有内容要点。语法结构和词汇单调,且存在较多语言错误,其中部分错误影响了理解。以下是具体的不足之处以及改进建议:

1. **标题及开头**:
   - 标题 "Live A Healthy Life" 可以理解,但首字母应小写为 "Live a Healthy Life"。
   - 开头句中 "Rcently" 应为 "Recently",并且 "live a healthy life" 应改为 "living a healthy life"。

2. **内容表达**:
   - "Form my perspective" 应为 "From my perspective"。
   - "it is totally undoubted that" 可以简化为 "it's clear that" 或 "it's certain that"。
   - "healthy life means a balanced diet and exercise" 建议细化说明健康生活还包括其他因素。

3. **语法及拼写错误**:
   - "i" 应为大写 "I"。
   - "easir" 应为 "easier"。
   - "doing exercise" 应为 "do exercise"。
   - "Form what i mention above" 应为 "From what I mentioned above"。

4. **结论部分**:
   - 结尾句不完整,“After all balanced and exercise” 需要补充完整的意思,可以改为 “After all, a balanced diet and regular exercise are key components of living a healthy life.”

总之,文章需要在语法、拼写和内容表达方面进一步完善,以确保信息清晰且完整地传达给读者。建议多使用更丰富的词汇和句型来提升语言的多样性。
洪生楼主 发表于 2024-10-25 12:36 | 显示全部楼层
陶果果 发表于 2024-10-25 12:29
评分档次:第四档 (7-12分)

评语:

请在我作文的基础上进行修改

陶果果 发表于 2024-10-25 12:36 | 显示全部楼层
洪生 发表于 2024-10-25 12:36
请在我作文的基础上进行修改


Recently, more and more people are talking about living a healthy life. From my perspective, it's clear that a healthy lifestyle involves a balanced diet and regular exercise. Here are the reasons why I believe so:

The first point I want to mention is that we should eat healthy food because a balanced diet can make us strong. Moreover, it's easier for us to understand that doing exercise is important because it can help us relax and reduce stress.

From what I mentioned above, we can easily conclude that living a healthy life requires both a balanced diet and regular exercise. After all, they are key components of maintaining our well-being.

这样修改后的作文更符合语法要求,并且在内容上也更完整地表达了您想传达的信息。希望这能帮助到您!
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