It is well known that uncivilized behaviors in society is very important in our lives.As a matter of fact, civilized behaviors in society is good for us in many ways.So I think have some uncivilized behaviors in society in our daily.For example,waste water resource,and so on.Here are the reasons we should do things.
Save water is very necessary.First of all,we should reduce waste water resource.In addition,the government should make some laws to save waster resource and improve people health.Last but not least,the government should encourage people plant more trees to prevent the environmenr.
As a result,as far as I am concerned,I think save water resource is very important,helpful and absolutely necessary.
Thank you for submitting your essay on "Uncivilized Behaviors in Society". Let's evaluate your work based on content, structure, and language use as per the provided criteria.
### Score: 7-12 (Fourth Band)
#### Content and Structure:
1. **Content Coverage**:
- Your essay attempts to tackle the topic by discussing the importance of saving water; however, it does not clearly address the broader range of uncivilized behaviors in society beyond the specific example of wasting water.
- You mentioned "waste water resource" but did not elaborate on other uncivilized behaviors despite mentioning them at the beginning.
2. **Organizational Structure**:
- The essay lacks a clear introduction, body, and conclusion format. The ideas are presented somewhat repetitively rather than in a well-organized manner.
- There's an abrupt shift from the mention of uncivilized behaviors to focusing solely on water, making the essay feel incomplete regarding coverage of the intended topic.
#### Language Use:
1. **Grammar and Syntax**:
- There are multiple grammatical errors, such as incorrect use of articles ("the environmenr" should be "the environment"), and subject-verb agreement problems (e.g., "Save water is very necessary" should be "Saving water is very necessary").
- Sentence fragments and awkward phrasing detract from the clarity of your message.
2. **Vocabulary**:
- Vocabulary use is limited and repetitive, especially around the phrase "save water resource."
- Attempt to vary your vocabulary to enhance the quality of your writing.
#### Suggestions for Improvement:
1. **Expand on Content**: Consider citing various examples of uncivilized behaviors such as littering, noise pollution, or disrespectful behaviors in public places to fully address the topic.
2. **Structure**: Start with an introduction that provides a clear thesis statement about uncivilized behaviors. Follow this with body paragraphs that each focus on a different example, concluding with a summary and possible solutions.
3. **Language and Grammar**: Revise your essay to correct grammar errors and improve sentence structures. Try using more complex sentences where appropriate and diversifying your word choice.
4. **Clarity**: Stay focused on the main theme, ensuring all parts of your essay contribute to the overall argument or purpose you've outlined in the introduction.
By incorporating these suggestions, you will likely enhance the comprehensiveness and coherence of your essay. Keep practicing to improve your writing skills further.