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Recently, more and more people are talking about dream trip. From my respective, it is totally undoubted that Shenzhen is the most want want to trip city on the world. Here's why I think so.

    First of all, I want to express that Shenzhen is a dynamic city, because Shenzhen has more than 40 years of history and a lot of young people. More importantly, it is easier for us to understand that Shenzhen allows us to maintain a positive attitude, because its technology and culture are developing very fast.

All in all, Shenzhen is the city I most want to travel to in the world.
请按照作文类型以及评分标准对上面的作文进行打分，并指出不足修改错误

本题总分为30分，按5个档次评分。

阅卷人应就总体印象给分，而不是按照语言错误的数量扣分。

评分时，先根据文章的内容要点、篇章结构和语言运用初步确定其所属的档次，然后依照该档次的具体要求酌情增减分数，最后给分应避免分数趋中现象，即不能只给中间档次的分数，该给高分时就应给高分(包含满分)，该给低分时就应给低分(包含0分)。

拼写和标点符号是语言准确性的一个方面。评分时，应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑，英式、美式拼写及用法均可接受。

如书写较差难以辨认，以致影响交际，或字数明显少于要求，将分数降低一个档次

2)评分标准

第一档    25-30分：圆满完成了试题规定的任务

• 清楚地表达了全部内容要点。
• 运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务要求
• 语言运用较为准确、恰当
  

第二档    19-24分：完成了试题规定的任务

• 清楚地表达了全部或关键内容要点
• 运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的基本要求
• 语言运用基本正确，虽有小错，但不影响理解
  

第三档    13-18分：基本完成了试题规定的任务

• 提及了关键内容要点(可能漏掉了个别内容)
• 运用的语法结构和词汇满足任务的最低要求
• 存在一些语言错误，但基本不影响理解
  

第四档    7-12分：完成了一部分试题规定的任务

• 遗漏或未能清楚表达内容要点
• 语法结构和词汇单调。
• 语言错误较多，部分错误影响理解
  

第五档1-6分：未完成试题规定的任务

• 明显遗漏内容要点
• 语法结构和词汇极单调
• 语言错误很多，严重影响理解
  

0分：所传达的信息或所用语言太少，无法评价；所写内容与题目要求完全无关

作文打分如下：

总体印象：第三档 13-18分

评语：这篇作文基本完成了试题规定的任务，提到了深圳是一个充满活力的城市，有着悠久的历史和年轻人口，而且技术和文化发展很快。但是还有一些需要改进的地方。首先，文章缺乏引言和结尾，没有很好地连接起来。其次，语法错误较多，需要注意语法的准确性和连贯性。最后，文章的观点和论证不够充分，需要进一步扩展和支持。

修改错误如下：

Recently, more and more people are talking about their dream trips. From my perspective, it is without a doubt that Shenzhen is the city I most want to visit in the world. Here's why I think so.

First of all, Shenzhen is a dynamic city with over 40 years of history and a large population of young people. This creates a vibrant and energetic atmosphere that is unique to Shenzhen. Furthermore, Shenzhen is known for its rapid technological advancements and cultural development. It is a city that embraces innovation and creativity, which allows its residents to maintain a positive attitude towards life.

In conclusion, Shenzhen offers a unique experience that combines history, youthfulness, technology, and culture. It is a city that I believe everyone should visit at least once in their lifetime.