作文批改

  I Like Playing Sports
Recently, more and more people are talking about liking play sports. From my perspective, it is totally undoubted that l like playing football. The reasons that I believe so are listed as below.
The first point that I want to mention is that it help me  keep good healthy, and that is because it can help me exercise my body and can also relax mind.  When you are upset, it may help you get rid it. What is more, it is easier for us to understand that it can bring me friendship, which is because we can play football together.
From what I mention above, we can also come to the conclusion that  l like playing football. After all, it help me  keep good healthy and also bring me friendship.

请按照作文类型以及评分标准对上面的作文进行打分，并指出不足

1)评分原则

本题总分为30分，按5个档次评分。

阅卷人应就总体印象给分，而不是按照语言错误的数量扣分。

评分时，先根据文章的内容要点、篇章结构和语言运用初步确定其所属的档次，然后依照该档次的具体要求酌情增减分数，最后给分应避免分数趋中现象，即不能只给中间档次的分数，该给高分时就应给高分(包含满分)，该给低分时就应给低分(包含0分)。

拼写和标点符号是语言准确性的一个方面。评分时，应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑，英式、美式拼写及用法均可接受。

如书写较差难以辨认，以致影响交际，或字数明显少于要求，将分数降低一个档次

2)评分标准

第一档    25-30分：圆满完成了试题规定的任务

清楚地表达了全部内容要点。
运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务要求
语言运用较为准确、恰当

第二档    19-24分：完成了试题规定的任务

清楚地表达了全部或关键内容要点
运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的基本要求
语言运用基本正确，虽有小错，但不影响理解

第三档    13-18分：基本完成了试题规定的任务

提及了关键内容要点(可能漏掉了个别内容)
运用的语法结构和词汇满足任务的最低要求
存在一些语言错误，但基本不影响理解

第四档    7-12分：完成了一部分试题规定的任务

遗漏或未能清楚表达内容要点
语法结构和词汇单调。
语言错误较多，部分错误影响理解

第五档1-6分：未完成试题规定的任务

明显遗漏内容要点
语法结构和词汇极单调
语言错误很多，严重影响理解

0分：所传达的信息或所用语言太少，无法评价；所写内容与题目要求完全无关

I Like Playing Sports

Recently, more and more people are talking about liking playing sports. From my perspective, it is totally undoubted that I like playing football. The reasons that I believe so are listed as below.

The first point that I want to mention is that it helps me keep good health, and that is because it can help me exercise my body and also relax my mind. When you are upset, it may help you get rid of it. What is more, it is easy for us to understand that it can bring me friendship, which is because we can play football together.

From what I mentioned above, we can also come to the conclusion that I like playing football. After all, it helps me keep good health and also brings me friendship.

评语：这篇作文是就喜欢打体育运动这个话题进行的写作，根据封闭式问题要求，学生提出了喜欢踢足球的理由。总体而言，该作文表达清楚，内容合理。然而，还有一些语言错误和不准确之处。

错误及不准确之处：
1. 第二句"From my perspective, it is totally undoubted that I like playing football."中的"undoubted"应改为"doubtless"。
2. 第三段第一句中的"that I want to mention"中的"that"可以省略。
3. 第四段的"helps me keep good health"中，"keep"应改为"maintain"。
4. 第四段的"What is more, it is easy for us to understand that it can bring me friendship"不够流畅，可以改为"What's more, it's easy to understand that playing football can also bring me friendship."
5. 第四段的"From what I mentioned above"应改为"Based on the reasons mentioned above"。
6. 最后一句"After all, it helps me keep good health and also brings me friendship."中的"and also"可以改为"as well as"。

综上所述，该作文按第二档给分(19-24分)。总体而言，内容合理，语言运用基本正确，但仍有一些小错误和不准确之处。希望学生能在今后的写作中更加注意语法和表达的准确性。