作文模版批改及评分

          Green Transportation
    I do a lot of things to support green transportation, such as riding a bike,taking a bus and walking. Personally, I prefer riding a bike.
    When I was a little child, I did not know how to ride a bike. My mother taught me to ride a bike after dinner every day. After I grow up, I learn to ride a bike by myself. Shortly afterwards, I teach my boy to ride a bike every day as well. I am used to riding a bike to work. Till now, it is my favorite. The primary factor is that it helps me to get a healthy body and reduce pollution.
    I hope that everyone can enjoy the fun of riding a bike, which is really helpful for our environment.

Green Transportation

As a university professor, I am pleased to see students and individuals actively supporting green transportation. It is encouraging to witness the enthusiasm towards adopting environmentally-friendly modes of transportation such as riding a bike, taking a bus, or simply walking. In this regard, I would like to offer my perspective on the importance of green transportation and the benefits it brings.

Firstly, allow me to emphasize the significance of riding a bike. Riding a bike not only serves as a means of transportation but also promotes a healthy lifestyle. By incorporating cycling into our daily routines, we can maintain an active lifestyle and keep ourselves physically fit. Moreover, cycling contributes to reducing pollution and carbon emissions, ultimately benefiting the environment and improving air quality. The positive impact that bike-riding has on our personal health and the environment cannot be overstated.

Furthermore, it is crucial to mention the role of education in spreading awareness about the advantages of green transportation. Teaching children the importance of riding a bike, for instance, not only instills in them a sense of responsibility towards the environment but also equips them with practical skills. As educators, we have the opportunity to educate our students on the benefits of green transportation and encourage them to adopt these practices in their daily lives.

In conclusion, supporting green transportation, particularly riding a bike, is essential in promoting a sustainable future. By choosing eco-friendly modes of transportation, we contribute to reducing pollution, improving our personal health, and creating a positive impact on the environment. As teachers, we have a vital role to play in educating and inspiring our students to embrace green transportation and make a difference. Let us all work together to create a greener and healthier world for future generations.

          Green Transportation
I do a lot of things to support green transportation, such as riding a bike,taking a bus and walking. Personally, I prefer riding a bike.
When I was a little child, I did not know how to ride a bike. My mother taught me to ride a bike after dinner every day. After I grow up, I learn to ride a bike by myself. Shortly afterwards, I teach my boy to ride a bike every day as well. I am used to riding a bike to work. Till now, it is my favorite. The primary factor is that it helps me to get a healthy body and reduce pollution.
   I hope that everyone can enjoy the fun of riding a bike, which is really helpful for our environment.

王红莉 发表于 2023-10-07 21:41
Green Transportation
I do a lot of things to suppo ...

Dear writer,

I have reviewed your essay on green transportation and would like to give you some feedback. Overall, your essay demonstrates a personal engagement with green transportation and highlights the benefits of riding a bike. However, there are a few areas where you can improve your writing.

First, it is important to structure your essay properly. Start with an introduction that captures the reader's attention and presents your main idea or thesis statement. Then, develop your argument in paragraphs that are well-organized and focused. Finally, conclude your essay by summarizing your main points and reinforcing your argument.

Additionally, pay attention to your language use. Try to vary your sentence structures to make your writing more engaging. Avoid using repetitive phrases, such as "riding a bike" or "green transportation." Instead, use synonyms or rephrase your sentences to add variety.

Moreover, it is essential to provide more concrete examples and evidence to support your statements. For instance, you can mention specific environmental benefits of riding a bike, such as reducing carbon emissions or improving air quality. Providing statistics or research findings on the positive impact of cycling would also strengthen your argument.

Furthermore, consider refining your conclusion. Instead of simply restating your main points, try to leave the reader with a thought-provoking question or call to action that encourages them to take part in green transportation.

Finally, proofread your essay for spelling and grammatical errors. This will ensure that your writing appears polished and professional.

Based on these suggestions, I would give your essay a rating of 7 out of 10. With some improvements in structure, language use, supporting evidence, and conclusion, your essay will become more persuasive and effective.

Keep up the good work!

Best regards,
[Your Name]