Online friends

    I am a young student,I come from Guangzhou.It is an honor to present my writing.Here,I will describe my simple opinion about online friend.
    Nowadays,with the coming of internet,more and more people make online friends.First of all,online friend is a convenient thing.Because people are busy with work have no free time to face to face communication.So,online friend becomes a very good method.At the same time.That can make different nationpeople at the internet exchange.That promotes cultural exchange.I think that is a good thing.
     Of course,some people have different opinion.I respect everyone opinion.That is all of my opinion about online friend.Thank you for your time on reading.Hope you have a great day.

This essay falls into the third category with a score of 14 out of 30. Here's a breakdown based on the scoring criteria:

1. **Content**:
   - The essay touches on the main topic, which is online friends, and mentions some points about its convenience and cultural exchange.
   - However, it lacks depth and additional content that could enrich the discussion, such as potential drawbacks or more detailed examples.

2. **Organization**:
   - The introduction is brief and somewhat formal, but it sets the stage for the topic.
   - The flow of ideas could be improved. Transitions between sentences and ideas are quite abrupt.
   - The conclusion is minimal, and there’s room to elaborate further on the points made.

3. **Language Use**:
   - There are multiple grammatical errors, such as "people are busy with work have no free time" which should be "people who are busy with work have no free time".
   - Punctuation is inconsistent, e.g., "At the same time.That can make different nationpeople at the internet exchange." This sentence needs rephrasing and proper punctuation.
   - Vocabulary use is basic and repetitive.

4. **Suggestions for Improvement**:
   - Expand the content by adding more details about both positive and negative aspects of online friendships.
   - Improve sentence structure and grammar. Consider using complex sentences and varying sentence beginnings to enhance readability.
   - Use conjunctions and transitions to improve the flow of ideas, making the writing more coherent.
   - Proofread for punctuation errors and ensure sentences are complete.

By addressing these issues, the essay could potentially move up to the second or even the first tier with more comprehensive content and improved language use.