评分：
**第三档：13-18分**
**分析：**
这篇作文基本完成了试题规定的任务，提及了一些关键内容要点，例如在线购物的流行和优势。然而，存在多个语法错误和拼写错误，对理解有一定影响。词汇和句法结构较为单调，但能传达出基本信息。
**具体问题及批改建议：**
1. **句子不完整或不连贯**
- 原文：“Online shopping is become more and more very popular in our daily life.Nowadays many people choose online shopping improve themselves life style.”
- 修改：“Online shopping is becoming more and more popular in our daily life. Nowadays, many people choose online shopping to improve their lifestyle.”
2. **拼写错误**
- 原文：“convence”
- 修改：“convenience”
3. **词汇使用不准确**
- 原文：“very meaningful life”
- 修改：“a much more meaningful life”
4. **语法错误**
- 原文：“In addition,we can buy different kind of things in online,and it can let our choose ourselves like things,so I find it is very much.”
- 修改：“In addition, we can buy different kinds of things online, and it allows us to choose the things we like, which I find very enjoyable.”
5. **表达不清晰**
- 原文：“So campared others,I perfer it.”
- 修改：“So compared to other methods, I prefer online shopping.”
6. **标点及分段问题**
- 添加恰当的标点和空格，使文章更易读。
**修改后的完整作文示例：**
---
**Online Shopping**
Online shopping is becoming more and more popular in our daily life. Nowadays, many people choose online shopping to improve their lifestyle. You can learn about products on the internet as well as through newspapers and other media.
I am interested in online shopping and I really enjoy it because it brings us much happiness. For example, it not only helps us improve our quality of life, but also brings us much convenience. What's more, it makes our lives much more meaningful. In addition, we can buy different kinds of things online, and it allows us to choose the things we like, which I find very enjoyable.
So compared to other methods, I prefer online shopping.
---
**点评：**
修改后的作文更加流畅，重点内容得到更清晰的表达，同时减少了语法和拼写错误。如果能进一步丰富词汇和句法结构，评分可以更高。 |
考前冲刺
