My Eisured time Enterainment Activities

I have many leisured time enterainment activities.For example,playing basketball,playing football,playing chess and feeding fish and so on.But today I would like to share one of my activities the all with you.
    I like playing basketball,every morning I usually playing basketball after I get up,one of my most important thing is playing  basketball,so I very like it.three reason let me like it.Fristly,it brings me much happiness.For example,we can play basketball keep our health,make sure our sport ability.secondly,it not only brings our much life style,but also can improve our health ability and so on,Whan's more,I hope to me can become a basketball sporter.finally,compared to other,I prefer to it,so my leisured time enterainment activity is playing basketball.

评分标准：

### 内容要点
- 提到了个人的闲暇娱乐活动
- 详细描述了其中一项活动，即打篮球
- 提供了三条喜欢打篮球的理由

### 篇章结构
- 开头简要概述闲暇娱乐活动
- 主体部分详细描述一项活动及其理由

### 语言运用
- 存在明显的语法和拼写错误
- 某些句子结构不够清晰，影响理解

### 判分档次
根据评分标准，本篇作文处于第三档（13-18分）。

### 具体判分依据
1. **内容要点**：基本完成任务，提及了主要内容要点，但有一些不清楚的表达。
2. **篇章结构**：文章基本有结构，但是每个段落的组织不够清晰。
3. **语言运用**：存在大量语法和拼写错误，但大多数句子能被理解。

### 建议得分：15分

### 详细批改建议
1. **标题**
   - 原标题：“My Eisured time Enterainment Activities”
   - 改进后：“My Leisure Time Entertainment Activities”

2. **拼写和语法错误**
   - “leisured time enterainment activities”应为“leisure time entertainment activities”。
   - “Fisitly”应为“Firstly”。
   - “Whan's more” 应为“What's more”。
   - “I hope to me can become a basketball sporter”应为“I hope I can become a basketball player”。

3. **句子结构**
   - “For example,playing basketball,playing football,playing chess and feeding fish and so on.” 建议修改为：“For example, I enjoy playing basketball, football, chess, and feeding fish.”
   - “one of my most important thing is playing basketball”建议修改为：“One of the most important things to me is playing basketball。”

4. **逻辑和连贯性**
   - “We can play basketball keep our health, make sure our sport ability.” 改为：“Playing basketball helps us stay healthy and improve our athletic abilities.”
   - “it not only brings our much life style, but also can improve our health ability and so on”改为：“It not only enriches our lifestyle but also improves our health.”

5. **结论**
   - “so my leisured time enterainment activity is playing basketball”可以改为更完整的句子，如：“Therefore, playing basketball is my favorite leisure time activity.”

### 修改后的范例

1. My Leisure Time Entertainment Activities
   
2. I have many leisure time entertainment activities. For example, I enjoy playing basketball, football, chess, and feeding fish. But today I would like to share one of these activities with you.
   
3. 
   
4. I like playing basketball. Every morning after I get up, I usually play basketball. Playing basketball is one of the most important things to me, and I like it for three reasons. Firstly, it brings me much happiness. Playing basketball helps us stay healthy and improve our athletic abilities. Secondly, it enriches our lifestyle and improves our health. What's more, I hope to become a basketball player in the future. Finally, compared to other activities, I prefer playing basketball. Therefore, playing basketball is my favorite leisure time activity.

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