作文批改

    Dear Tom

   This is Li Ke from Beijing. The reason that I am writing to you is because I am looking for a teaching job. Besides of that, here goes another thing that i think is important, which is that  I think I will be a good teacher.

   Lastly, I believe you should know this at the very end of my letter, and that is teacher  is great job. I appreciate your time for reading my letter and I am looking forward to you reply.

   I hope everything goes with you life.

   Li Ke

请按照作文类型以及评分标准对上面的作文进行打分，并指出不足

1)评分原则

本题总分为30分，按5个档次评分。

阅卷人应就总体印象给分，而不是按照语言错误的数量扣分。

评分时，先根据文章的内容要点、篇章结构和语言运用初步确定其所属的档次，然后依照该档次的具体要求酌情增减分数，最后给分应避免分数趋中现象，即不能只给中间档次的分数，该给高分时就应给高分(包含满分)，该给低分时就应给低分(包含0分)。

拼写和标点符号是语言准确性的一个方面。评分时，应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑，英式、美式拼写及用法均可接受。

如书写较差难以辨认，以致影响交际，或字数明显少于要求，将分数降低一个档次

2)评分标准

第一档    25-30分：圆满完成了试题规定的任务

清楚地表达了全部内容要点。
运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务要求
语言运用较为准确、恰当

第二档    19-24分：完成了试题规定的任务

清楚地表达了全部或关键内容要点
运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的基本要求
语言运用基本正确，虽有小错，但不影响理解

第三档    13-18分：基本完成了试题规定的任务

提及了关键内容要点(可能漏掉了个别内容)
运用的语法结构和词汇满足任务的最低要求
存在一些语言错误，但基本不影响理解

第四档    7-12分：完成了一部分试题规定的任务

遗漏或未能清楚表达内容要点
语法结构和词汇单调。
语言错误较多，部分错误影响理解

第五档1-6分：未完成试题规定的任务

明显遗漏内容要点
语法结构和词汇极单调
语言错误很多，严重影响理解

0分：所传达的信息或所用语言太少，无法评价；所写内容与题目要求完全无关

Dear Tom,

This is Li Ke from Beijing. I am writing to apply for a teaching job. Firstly, I believe that I will be a good teacher. Secondly, teaching is a great job.

Thank you for taking the time to read my letter. I look forward to your reply. I hope everything is going well with you.

Best regards,
Li Ke

评分：第三档 13-18分

评语：作文基本完成了任务，包括申请教职和强调自己适合成为一名老师。语法结构和词汇基本满足要求，但存在一些错误。然而，作文有些简洁，可以增加更多的信息和内容。

修改建议：可以在描述自己适合成为老师时，提供更具体的原因和经历。此外，可以扩展最后一段，表达对工作机会的期待和对面试的兴趣，并再次感谢对方阅读信件。此外，要注意语法错误和标点符号的使用。

修改后的作文：

Dear Tom,

This is Li Ke from Beijing. I am writing to apply for a teaching job. I have always had a passion for education and I believe that I will be a good teacher. I have experience working with students of different ages and backgrounds, which has helped me develop effective teaching strategies.

Teaching is not just a job for me; it is a calling. I find great joy in helping students learn and grow. I believe in creating a positive and supportive learning environment where students feel motivated and inspired. My goal as a teacher is not just to impart knowledge, but also to instill a love for learning in my students.

I appreciate your time in considering my application and I am eagerly looking forward to the opportunity to discuss my qualifications further in an interview. Thank you once again for considering my application.

Best regards,

Li Ke