2017年10月英语二作文

作文内容：
2017年10月:完成一篇100个词左右的英文写作任务。
51 假设你暑假你参加了你所在社区组织的义工活动，请给你的美国朋友TOM写一封英文电子邮件，与他分享你的感想，内容包括：
  你做了什么义工工作
  你认为做义工的意义是什么？

Dear Tom:

   This is Li Ke from your friend. The reasonthat I am writing to you is because I took part in the volunteer my localcommunity organization during my summer vacation. I became a volunteer to help theelderly. Besides of that, here goes another thing that I think is important,which is that I helped them to wash the clothes, do the housework, read forthem and chat with them. I could see their happiness from their face when I wasdoing these things. And, doing such work makes our own life more colorful andmeaningful too. It`s really great that life of those in need can be littleeasier with the help of volunteers.

  Howdo you think of it? I am looking forward to receiving your reply.

BestFriend !

Li Ke

请按照作文类型以及评分标准对上面的作文进行打分，并指出不足

1)评分原则

本题总分为30分，按5个档次评分。

阅卷人应就总体印象给分，而不是按照语言错误的数量扣分。

评分时，先根据文章的内容要点、篇章结构和语言运用初步确定其所属的档次，然后依照该档次的具体要求酌情增减分数，最后给分应避免分数趋中现象，即不能只给中间档次的分数，该给高分时就应给高分(包含满分)，该给低分时就应给低分(包含0分)。

拼写和标点符号是语言准确性的一个方面。评分时，应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑，英式、美式拼写及用法均可接受。

如书写较差难以辨认，以致影响交际，或字数明显少于要求，将分数降低一个档次

2)评分标准

第一档    25-30分：圆满完成了试题规定的任务

• 清楚地表达了全部内容要点。
• 运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务要求
• 语言运用较为准确、恰当
  

第二档    19-24分：完成了试题规定的任务

• 清楚地表达了全部或关键内容要点
• 运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的基本要求
• 语言运用基本正确，虽有小错，但不影响理解
  

第三档    13-18分：基本完成了试题规定的任务

• 提及了关键内容要点(可能漏掉了个别内容)
• 运用的语法结构和词汇满足任务的最低要求
• 存在一些语言错误，但基本不影响理解
  

第四档    7-12分：完成了一部分试题规定的任务

• 遗漏或未能清楚表达内容要点
• 语法结构和词汇单调。
• 语言错误较多，部分错误影响理解
  

第五档1-6分：未完成试题规定的任务

• 明显遗漏内容要点
• 语法结构和词汇极单调
• 语言错误很多，严重影响理解
  

0分：所传达的信息或所用语言太少，无法评价；所写内容与题目要求完全无关

评分：第二档 19-24分

该作文基本完成了试题规定的任务，清楚地表达了全部或关键内容要点。内容包括了参加义工活动的具体工作以及对做义工的意义的思考。语法结构和词汇使用基本满足任务要求，虽有小错但不影响理解。需要注意的是，邮件开头部分可以更加友好、亲切一些，适当增加问候语和交流询问等。此外，文章可以增加一些细节描述来丰富内容，使其更生动有趣。语言错误较少，但还是可以进一步提高准确性和恰当性。总体来说，这篇作文给人留下了比较好的印象，但仍有提升空间。

邮件开头部分如何更加友好、亲切一些，适当增加问候语和交流询问等。请举例。

sophia168118 发表于 2023-10-13 21:04
邮件开头部分如何更加友好、亲切一些，适当增加问候语 ...

Dear Tom,

I hope this email finds you well! It's been a while since we last talked. How have you been? I trust everything is going great for you.

I wanted to take a moment to share an amazing experience with you. During my summer vacation, I had the opportunity to be a volunteer in the local community organization. It was truly fulfilling and I want to tell you all about it.

By joining as a volunteer, I had the privilege of helping the elderly in our community. I assisted them with various tasks, such as washing their clothes, doing housework, reading for them, and simply chatting with them. The joy and happiness I saw on their faces while performing these acts of kindness were priceless. It made me realize that being a volunteer not only brings support to those in need but also adds colors and meaning to our own lives.

I would love to hear your thoughts on volunteering. Have you ever been a part of any volunteer activities? If so, what were your experiences like? If not, do you think it's something you would consider in the future?

Looking forward to your reply and catching up on everything.

Best regards,
Li Ke