作文评分并修改

作文内容：

     It is well know that reading is very important in our lives. Some people want to use E-books, some people like use paper books. As for me, I like use paper books。
      As far as paper books are concerned, the advantages lie in enjoyment that real reading bring us ,which means not only can we make notes in the real books, but also we can preserve them as long as possible. Paper books are compared with E-books, and paper books are expensive. But in my opinion, it makes easier for me.
      In the eyes of me, though e-books are attractive, I prefer to paper books. They can calm me down, and keep track of my real feelings It is important that they don`t have any radition.



请按照作文类型以及评分标准对上面的作文进行打分，并指出不足

1)评分原则

本题总分为30分，按5个档次评分。

阅卷人应就总体印象给分，而不是按照语言错误的数量扣分。

评分时，先根据文章的内容要点、篇章结构和语言运用初步确定其所属的档次，然后依照该档次的具体要求酌情增减分数，最后给分应避免分数趋中现象，即不能只给中间档次的分数，该给高分时就应给高分(包含满分)，该给低分时就应给低分(包含0分)。

拼写和标点符号是语言准确性的一个方面。评分时，应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑，英式、美式拼写及用法均可接受。

如书写较差难以辨认，以致影响交际，或字数明显少于要求，将分数降低一个档次

2)评分标准

第一档    25-30分：圆满完成了试题规定的任务

• 清楚地表达了全部内容要点。
• 运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务要求
• 语言运用较为准确、恰当
  

第二档    19-24分：完成了试题规定的任务

• 清楚地表达了全部或关键内容要点
• 运用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的基本要求
• 语言运用基本正确，虽有小错，但不影响理解
  

第三档    13-18分：基本完成了试题规定的任务

• 提及了关键内容要点(可能漏掉了个别内容)
• 运用的语法结构和词汇满足任务的最低要求
• 存在一些语言错误，但基本不影响理解
  

第四档    7-12分：完成了一部分试题规定的任务

• 遗漏或未能清楚表达内容要点
• 语法结构和词汇单调。
• 语言错误较多，部分错误影响理解
  

第五档1-6分：未完成试题规定的任务

• 明显遗漏内容要点
• 语法结构和词汇极单调
• 语言错误很多，严重影响理解
  

0分：所传达的信息或所用语言太少，无法评价；所写内容与题目要求完全无关

根据提供的评分标准，对该作文进行打分如下：

第三档    13-18分：基本完成了试题规定的任务

- 虽然开头部分提到了阅读对我们生活的重要性，但没有给出具体的解释或论证。
- 主题句不够清晰，内容结构组织不够紧密。
- 语法错误较多，如动词时态、主谓一致等。
- 用词不够准确，如“like use”应为“like to use”，“enjoyment that real reading bring us”应为“the enjoyment that reading a physical book brings”，“preserve them as long as possible”应为“keep them for a longer time”。

建议改进：

- 在开头部分，可以进一步说明为什么阅读对我们的生活重要，如丰富知识、拓宽视野等。
- 在中间部分，可以引用一两个具体例子来支持自己喜欢纸质书的观点。
- 注意语法的准确性，特别是动词时态、主谓一致等方面。
- 尝试使用更准确、恰当的词汇表达观点。

修改后的作文：

     It is well known that reading is very important in our lives. Reading enriches our knowledge and broadens our horizons. Some people prefer to use E-books, while others, like me, prefer to use paper books.
     
     As for me, I prefer using paper books for a number of reasons. Firstly, reading a physical book brings me enjoyment that cannot be replaced by E-books. I can make notes in the margins, underline important passages, and truly engage with the text. Secondly, paper books can be preserved for a longer time. Unlike E-books which may be accidentally deleted or lost due to technical glitches, paper books can be kept on my bookshelf and remain with me forever. Lastly, some studies suggest that excessive exposure to digital screens may have adverse health effects, such as eye strain and sleep disturbances. Therefore, reading from paper books allows me to enjoy the reading experience without worrying about any potential harm from radiation.

     In conclusion, while E-books may have their own advantages, I personally find more enjoyment and benefits from reading paper books. They provide a sense of calmness and connection with the text that E-books cannot replicate. Moreover, the ability to physically interact with the book and preserve it long-term make paper books a valuable choice for me.