Children's Self-Control
Teaching your child self-control will help him get along with others, make good choices and stay safe. Teaching self-control starts early and truly and never stops. The thoughtful parent knows that each child is an individual with a will of its own. Respect for a child's need will be balanced with respect for the need of others. Teaching your child self-control involves helping him to: think before acting; control impulse; weigh consequences; make safe and acceptable choices.
Knowing what to expect from your child at each stage of growth will provide guideposts as your child grows. Lessons in self-control need to be age-appropriate. Parents also need to agree on clear limits and boundaries as well as reasonable consequences at each stage of development.
It is important to be a model of self-control for your child. Controlling the urge to yell when in a frustrating situation will show your child it can be done. Considering consequences by thinking aloud will give your child a living example of thinking before acting. Your every- day display of kindness, patience and thoughtful regard will go farther than anything else!
Babies and toddlers experience frustration often as they do not have the means to communicate or acquire what they need and want. Distracting the very young children can work sometimes.
As preschoolers get older, say age two or beyond, they may need to cool down. Placing them on a chair for a minute or two may stop out-of-control behavior. As soon as the child settles, he should be allowed to move from the time-out area. This can be an effective way of teaching early self-control.
If you find you are not able to handle your young child's frustration, it is important to get help from a counselor. He will help you to find ways to deal with your own feelings of frustration. |
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