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Keil 发表于 2023-4-14 23:24 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
My Favorite TV program
Recently, more and more people are taking about favorite TV program. From my perspective, it is totally undoubted that the News Report has always been my favorite TV program. The reasons why I believe so are listed as below.
The first point that I want to mention is that the News Report contains a large amount of information, and that is because ranging from the international political situation to the latest football game. What is more, it’s easier for us to understand that is a way of communication, which is because people can know and understand world affairs.
From what I mention above, we can easily come to the conclusion that News Report has my favorite TV program. After all, News Report contains a large amount of information and people can know and understand world affairs.
admin 发表于 2023-4-14 23:25 | 显示全部楼层
建议修改:

我最喜欢的电视节目

近来,越来越多的人在讨论自己最喜欢的电视节目。从我的角度来看,毫无疑问地,新闻报道一直是我最喜欢的电视节目。我相信这样看的原因如下所述。

我想提到的第一个点是,新闻报道包含了大量的信息,因为它不仅涵盖国际政治状况,还包括了最新的足球比赛等内容。而且,更容易理解的是,这是一种交流方式,因为人们可以了解和理解全球事务。

基于以上所述,我们可以轻松得出结论,新闻报道是我最喜欢的电视节目。毕竟,新闻报道包含了大量信息,人们可以了解和理解全球事务。

修改意见:
1. 第一句话应该加上“关于这个话题”的主语,才能使题目与文章联系起来。
2. 在开头段落中,重复提到“从我角度来看、毫无疑问地”等词语会削弱文章的说服力,可以改为用更客观的方式陈述。
3. 第三段结尾可以改进,可以将重点再次突出,同时也可以增加文章连贯性。
Keil楼主 发表于 2023-4-14 23:29 | 显示全部楼层

Recently, more and more people are taking about favorite TV program. From my perspective, it is totally undoubted that the News Report has always been my favorite TV program. The reasons why I believe so are listed as below.
The first point that I want to mention is that the News Report contains a large amount of information, and that is because ranging from the international political situation to the latest football game. What is more, it’s easier for us to understand that is a way of communication, which is because people can know and understand world affairs.
From what I mention above, we can easily come to the conclusion that News Report has my favorite TV program. After all, News Report contains a large amount of information and people can know and understand world affairs.
admin 发表于 2023-4-14 23:29 | 显示全部楼层
建议修改:最近,越来越多的人在谈论他们最喜欢的电视节目。从我的角度来看,毫无疑问,新闻报道一直是我最喜欢的电视节目。我认为这是因为新闻报道包含大量的信息,涵盖了从国际政治形势到最新的足球比赛等各个方面的内容。此外,新闻报道也是一种交流方式,通过它,人们可以了解和理解全球事务。综上所述,我很喜欢新闻报道。因为它包含有用的信息,可以帮助人们了解世界,同时也能够促进人们相互交流。

修改意见:1. 第一句话应该加上“关于这个话题”的主语,才能使题目与文章联系起来。2. 开头段落中不需要重复提到“从我角度来看、毫无疑问地”等词语,而是更好的方式是用客观的方式表达。3. 更好的讲述自己的看法的方式是要具体,这样文章更加生动。4. 最后一段可以增加几句话来总结前面的论据,并强调自己对新闻报道的喜好程度。
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